Nov
8
2007
The Fife
There are lunch restaurants, and then there are institutions. For a certain segment of the working class in the west end (and on the south side), the only lunch institution that cuts the mustard is Fife N Dekel. If you have not tasted their strawberry rhubarb pie, you simply haven’t experienced all that this life has to offer. I remember the original Fife N’ Dekel. It was a small pie shop located on 118th avenue in Beverly. These days they boast three locations and command a fierce loyalty amongst their clientele. I know a few people who cannot be swayed from the ‘Fife. They simply refuse to acknowledge the existence of any other lunch option, even if I’m buying. “Boston Pizza? Are they still in business? Can I get a ham on rye and a bowl of NE Clam there? No? Sorry, I’ll pass.”
Deciding to go for lunch at the Fife is a commitment. You must be aware that the place is always exceedingly busy and that you will wait in a long line (keep up with their daily specials here). You must be prepared to deal with aggressive line jumpers – those that would climb over their mothers to get closer to the sandwich sneeze guard. The noon rush to the Fife is an interesting study in humanity. Each day, swarms of hungry cubicle dwellers, middle managers, and safely-dressed greige employees fall over themselves to get a tuna salad sandwich, bowl of tomato rice soup, and a slab of pie. Sharpen your elbows. The food is delivered by the staff with the utmost speed and accuracy. I love those girls. They make a sandwich a true work of art. Be sure to ask for extra hot peppers and lots of pickles on the side. At the end of it all – when you’ve got yer meat and yer soup – the pie case will beckon. You will stop. You will cave. Big, big men with 24-pack bellies who cheat on their wives and armwrestle in bars cave at the pie case.
You can’t go without the Fife N Dekel pie. It’s like going to Philadelphia and not making the trip to Pat’s King of Steaks for a genuine Philly Cheese Steak. It’s simply not done. Diabetic, you say? Fuck it. The pie is worth the trip to the emergency room. You will never taste a finer slice of strawberry rhubarb in this city. And you better have your wallet open, because lunch with a slice of the best pie in Edmonton ain’t cheap. Expect to drop at least twelve to fifteen bucks all told. You will walk away from the Fife a wiser, happier, and well-rounded human being. You may travel long distances to get to Fife N Dekel. You will belong to a secret sect where passive brainwashing is the norm, and $6.00 for a ham sandwich will suddenly seem cheap. You will submit. You will buy me lunch, dammit.
